I want to do you till i cant cum anymore. Till all i get is a little flag that says "bang".
I feel like I got hit by a truck made out of Jack Daniels.
Let's just say there's a reason that "suede" rhymes with "laid".
I wish my period boobs were my regular boobs.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
they told you the "weed man" wouldn't come until you were asleep, like santa claus. you believed it.
I just found out my boyfriend is cheating on me, please tell me Carl is a unisex name.
Could someone please kill snooki before she contributes to the gene pool.
the cop cuffed us all with 40's still taped to our hands
He stole her cigarettes and walked 15 miles just so he wouldn't have to wake up next to her. God I love being a lesbian.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
This is going to be BYOBM Vegas trip: Bring Your Own Bail Money.
Is YOLO really just a socially acceptable way to say you enjoy putting things up your nose?
P.S. I just made up pleasure scepter for the purpose of that last message.
Seriously I can't get a booty call for some baked goods.
I have the rest of my life to settle down this is totally time for friends and pizza
No way in hell. Unless I was drunk Tindering again....my swiping finger gets drunk too I guess
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