After last night I still want u
But please keep that on the DL
My bad bro. I had no idea that when i suggested our triva team name be my last abortion tickled, that she would bring up cancun. Stay strong i think she really liked you
can't decide if i want to get drunk or coked for this harry potter thing.. it is kind of long
aren't you going with children?
it was the least impressive dick i've ever seen... and i've changed babies' diapers.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
his penis was the training wheels of my sex life
the table of underagers at this wedding were seated 10ft from the open bar. currently 30 open containers on the table for 5 people. dinner hasn't even been served yet.
Would the plural word for douche be deese? "Look at these deese bags"?
Are you high?
Mom told me you snuck booze into a concert in a cheez its box...I have never been prouder to be related to you
I don't really want to talk about it, but if anyone finds my unicorn mask with my bra in it, I would really like that back.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I can't wait to get home and drunk cuddle your dog
It was a frighteningly large penis to say the least
And remember people can't hear you kick ass in space
He paid for a 5 star hotel suite and I raided the mini bar after he left. I think that’s bad karma. Want some pringles?
I figured it out! There's blood on the kitchen floor because I fell into the dishwasher. And there's a face dent. And it doesn't work.
Yea.....I saw that happen.
Stacy lit a fart and burn half of the couch down before we can put the Flames out. Bring your truck.
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