I've already planned a drinking game for mtvs jersey shore....jagerbomb everytime they do
another holiday season passes without receiving a dick in a box, where did i go wrong in life?
he even offered to make my bed in the morning.
Heed the warning of the ghost of Oktoberfest present: German beer is soooooooo much better than our watered down children's piss. also lost all my clothes and am wearing lederhosen the rest of the trip.
and a jello shot exploded in my bra last night. Now I have blueberry smurfette boobs. Awesome.
And apparently i asked another younger guy at the bar if he wanted his bud light pumped straight into his vag. As i put back an irish car bomb...
Who wouldn't want a man who can knock a guy out but also loves the bachelor.
It's the best of both worlds
While he was gone for spring break I took his head board... I don't wanna wake up from his shenanigans for the rest of my college career.
so i might have figured out why that girl isn't talking to me...I'm 90% confident I didn't give her a pillow when she stayed over >.>
So when I walked out, everyone was chanting ONE OF US, someone draped a lei over my head, and then she grabbed my ass and dragged me back into the bedroom. I'd say it was a pretty good night to lose my virginity.
I don't know how Dave is alive, I feel like he's been drinking since I met him.
Now go get drunk with your fam and get back into ur christmas groove. No time for gonnorhea
It's ok, it's locked within patented Sealrite technology. That puke is staying fresh
My lease is up and I've been thinking, it's only fair that the guys I've fucked in this apartment in the past year help me move. They enjoyed the bed, now help me move it.
I have vodka, fruit gushers, and health insurance. Let's party.
Randomize
