I just woke up to crumpled tissues everywhere. Looks like it was another night filled with tears and semen.
is it really weird I just got "suckable tits" in my honesty box and I'm flattered??
i wanted to sleep on a waterbed so i filled up my bathtub so i could fall asleep in it...
I had sex with her because I didn't want to hurt her feelings.. You're the one who told me I should be more sensitive.
This is so pathetic it makes me miss snorting lines alone in my room listening to 'one more drink'.
He was having trouble staying hard then just stopped mid-sex and said "it's overheating" while pointing to his dick.
It's cheaper then a lap dance and you get your hair cut.
She peed in the limo. She stood up and pulled up her dress and peed on the floor of the limo.
I just banged your sister. Thats what you get for takibg my lunch money in 2 grade, boom, boom fiyyaa powaa
I'm drunk, laying in bed, eating macaroni salad. I dropped a piece and tried to pick it up with a fork. My cleavage is bleeding and I haven't been laid yet. Heeeyyyy!!!
Having a heartfelt conversation with your boyfriends mom while sexting her son. If that's not multitasking, I don't know what is.
well that's what you get for sleeping with a guy called 'the defiler'
Wait, but now I'm curious. In what position were y'all when the cops came? Were you guys butt ass naked in the car? 😂😂
Can we start referring to attractive men as "A fine piece of dick?"
Best news I’ve heard all day. Cookies and dick. What more could a girl ask for?
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