"women exchanges sex for chips" on msnbc
damn even the hoes are getting hit by this economy
Def ran into my elementary school babysitter at the grocery store. Still hot. And she complimented my beer choice. It feels good to still have her approval
so i don't know how many beers it takes to make a recliner look like a toilet, but that's how many i had.
Passed out in a rocking chair on her porch. Woke up to the tow truck taking away my car.
Oh you're gonna love this story. I almost cut off a little girl's pony tail.
Also, I threw up on the playground again. I've honestly had more fun there this past summer than I did in my entire childhood.
Let's be honest, your relationships fail because the man you're looking for is the equivalent of an intellectual blow-up doll.
Im not coming back to that place until im drunk. If I walk in there sober Ill start screaming uncontrollably. Not words, just sounds.
Fulfilled a bucket list goal last night. Borrowed a dollar from a stripper to buy smokes
God bless Atlanta.
Two dicks, one me.
Yoga's definitely paying off.
But wait then while giving his drive thru order he goes in mid sentence, "Hey baby it's Travis remember me?"
She pinched my nipples out of nowhere as I was about to come... I think I found god
Can you please explain to me why there are 7 bags of tacos in my bed?
Im wearing black today mourning the orgasm i couldn't get this morning :(
I know I joke about running from my problems a lot but I'm 3 miles off-campus and need a ride
Randomize
