I cannot convey how much I really do love Chris Hansen. FYI: he is the JC Chasez of my adult years.
i keep forgetting that not all of my female friends are bisexual.
Karaoke into a bottle of boones. dear summer in alabama, glad to see you again.
I apologize for forcing you to look at my boob when we were high. It was uncalled for
She was knocking on the tree demanding to be let in
Well its kinda hard to gift wrap an orgasm
Dick in a box?
2nd fun fact: he has a square tan line around his dick.
We were tripping too hard to figure out to tell him where we were so we sent a picture of me laying outside the tent saying "find us"
I think the exact words were 'I'd lett him to the weirdest shit to me'
I'm going to get old and fat one day... probably pretty soon and I'm not going to have any pictures to show to my cats of what I once looked like.
I had jack at 8 am= instant drunk
He snapchated me a photo of his penis with the caption "it needs a home".
but, alas, I am not the lady in the streets. I'm simply the freak in the sheets.
Excuse you? I'm an asshole at least 90% of the time. Get it right.
long story short, he tried to fuck me standing up, toppled over, and now I have four stitches next to my eye
Randomize
