Ross. Joey. Chandler. Who would you do?
he threw mangos from the tree he was in at people and got arrested for harassment
I feel like I bought a front row ticket to watch her screw up her life
so he reminded me it was our 9 month anniversary and then said "we could've had a baby by now"
I was talking to a guy at my work, and mid-sentence he started vomiting violently for about five minutes, then he said, " great dope" and carried on like nothing had happened.
God, for the last time, no I did not break my nose doing a keg-stand just for a nose job.
What's the best way to say, "it's too early in our relationship to leave me at your place alone"? Steal something?
Definitely want to eloquently cunt punt those bitches thru the field goals of life.
obviously he wasnt ready for this jelly and you can quote me on that
I'm just saying; the box truck will cost less then dorms or rent, and we can always crash where the party is.
As we have told you before, the first rule of hook-up bingo is we don't talk about hook-up bingo
the amount of times i have been intoxicated, barefoot, and in a robe at 3 am at the quick check by your house is impressive, especially since i live an hour away
You came in last night, ate an entire avocado in silence, and then told me I should never accept rides from strangers. Not sure I even want to know what happened to you last night!
If you're signed up as "sober sister" can you do cocaine or nah
He is farting the alphabet right now. In the goddamned restaurant. You don't get to recommend men anymore. Or restaurants for that matter.
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