And my awkwardness continues. I felt the need to send him a text that said roar. I did it.
I just spent an unhealthy amount of money overnighting a full adult sized Trix Rabbit Halloween costume
dude, she masturbates with a ken doll.
I'm still reeling over the fact that you beat us all at Risk while you were flat on your ass drunk and falling asleep on South America.
I hope the prosecutor is a dude cause my lawyer is hot.
we may have ended up at a gay bar on accident. we're gonna work this to get free drinks.
After much deliberation I've decided to name my penis "Arthur", hope your mom's surgery goes well.
The AC broke so he ended up sleeping in the front yard and left his one night stand on the couch.
My first drink last night was a 2-liter of jameson and coke. So hung over it hurt to put my pants back on
It's situations like these that make me climb out of windows
You know, this is NOT how I pictured my life would be when I was younger, and yet here we are.
He texted me at 4:30 in the morning saying "I'm not drunk but I think you're beautiful" and then a facebook message at 6 am saying "hi" and the subject was "oh"
I've come to the conclusion, I should prob have at least 20 hr supervision. I would say 24, but I'm guaranteed to pass out for at least 4 hrs a day
Someone drank my pedialite!
YOU drank your pedialite. I watched you chase shots with it!
You got up in the middle of a sentence, puked, came out and poured another glass of wine and continued your story.
Randomize
