She was lying the whole time!
She was a great actress
I was a great dumbass
you ran into the room and announced "I JUST FUCKED HER IN THE ASS". apparently you forgot she left the bedroom 5 minutes before you and was standing with us all.
I'm outside your house...sorry I feel like I don't need formal invites anymore.
Anyway, my grandfather thinks you're attractive
she made my bed before she left. i think i'm gonna keep banging her to get the housework done
I'm pretty sure my penis yawned halfway through. That loose.
He's bringing condoms over for me in case we "bone".... the fact he calls it boning is not a great start.
I know. he thinks we're 'meant to be'. No we're fucking not. God wouldn't give my soulmate a pencil dick.
the gays at disneyland are vicious
My new dealer is 16. I have been getting high longer than he has been alive.
I don't see the problem
I was wasted and the time changed. I blame the male strippers.
The name of tonight's festivities is hereby decreed to be the "Honey Boo Boo Hootenanny".
is leaving the club to fk in his friends van subtle?
No I did not just post a Craigslist ad for a used stripper pole because I can't afford my own. But now that you put the idea in my head I might have to.
You've created a tinder dominating monster.
Randomize
