Ugh now I'll have to carry around an overnight bag to all the bars I visit tonight. but hey! maybe I'll meet a dude! And need it!
So... how did lowering your standards work out last night?
she was bad bro. like...id rather put my dick in a blender. twice.
im getting my college education on yahoo answers.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
we got plastered, then made lists of anything thats ever been in our vaginas
I know. Brad is upset because he was lower on the list than "that carrot stick"
I told him I had AIDS after he bit me. His dad cried. I think I just ruined the little guy's 3rd birthday, but he had in coming.
You asked the waitress what the corking fee would be on the Joose you smuggled into the restaurant.
Please come home, i don't want to feel like basket garbage girl but I'm in your alleyway and not sure how to change that.
But how will the next generation learn about life choices without a Jersery Shore?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
god, I have more takeout restaurants in my contacts than friends
I threw up through my nose tonight. Happy cinco de mayo
You declared that afternoon sex will be referred to as "wet naps" from now on
You are the epitome of what awesome would taste like.
I'm worried about us. We are almost 30 and we still drink jaeger bombs till we black out. Wait, no I'm not. I'm excited about us.
Think he has a gf
Yea that shit doesn’t necessarily stop me
Randomize