There is a girl getting fingered on my left, a middle aged drink man smoking a bong and two girls flashing the cameras in front of me. I'm in the middle trying to maintain my innocence.
I kept waking up & seeing my Goodfellas poster and thinking it was a window with people crammed against it staring at me.
I guess the lighting in my room made it look like they were moving. I remember telling myself that they were watching over me and protecting me from the cops
i used the pictures of vaginas in your biology book to jack off.
My fight-or-flight response is really more fight-or-fuck
maybe next time you'll take an ex boyfriend warning you that she's batshit crazy as a warning instead of a challenge
He likes bondage and spanking and shit.
Oh, so "normal" kinky not "I wanna pee on people" kinky. I can handle that.
MEET ME OUTSIDE YOUR HOUSE IN THREE MINUTES. BE DRUNK. THIS IS NOT A DRILL.
I apologize in advance for the number of sex toys drying on the bathroom sink.
Hooked up with a straight guy while dressed as a man. I'm unstoppable.
I'm dangerously close to tossing this whole "morals" bullshit and swan-diving into the fuckboy lifestyle.
What, wait. You are not supposed to drink wine out of the bottle?
I’m sorry I got high and yelled about the patriarchy.
Somehow I don't think offering me edibles is what dad meant by checking in on me
They're the hard candy kind!
Dear in laws. I am not spending any holidays with you. I dislike your company. A lot.
So some guy thought I took second place in a male stripper competition
Randomize
