Every time a guy reaches down to touch my vag, i feel really sorry for all the transgender girls who still have a penis there.
That's weird cause every time i feel a girls vag i feel way worse for all the guys who reached down there and got a penis.
I just saw that your im name has '4eva' in it. Your man card has been revoked.
You said you wanted to go to louisiana and get arrested by Steven segal
By the way, her vagina was so tight i was worried that i would be stuck forever
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I woke up hugging a loaf of bread and a water bottle this morning
My face left an imprint in the loaf...
I know it was you that I fucked last night... I can smell my disappointment all over the sheets
I just walked past a woman in the bar stroking a mans crotch, yelling 'I made this. I made this happen.'
Just beat off to internet porn while talking to my mom on the phone and eating a cinnamon roll. U have 5 minutes to get on my level
I'll start choreographing the sperm rain dance now
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Also, am I the only one who noticed he didn't fuck you until after you were technically a cripple? Or am I reading into this too much? Congrats on that btw
No. Not going out tonight. No. It's Tuesday. Xanax and Full House Tuesday.
We fucked. Had a political debate. I won. So I sat on his face.
Just let me put on a bra and brush the alcohol out of my hair.
I haven't lost it. I know I'm not a prophet. It was a joke.
After the edible you claimed you were talking to my cat. We're in our 30s now, what was once cute is now a liability.
My parents are coming to visit the 28th. How bad is it that I put a reminder in my phone to "hide sex toys"?