So what's the moral of this story? Aside from 'lesbians hold grudges'?
Two penises later: I might be straighter than I think.
Trying to figure out which chair my head was under last night
If I EVER wake up with two black eyes again you better come up with a better story than trying to see how many punches I could take.
I accidentally got a lemon stuck in your bong. I was trying to make it taste good. Sorry
I called him and he said hell call me back hes in the middle of his kareokee song he was out by himself and his dog
Nothing says happy gameday like waking up in only an ACC Championship shirt in the qb's bed with a different football player
You work today? I woke up with a raging boner that was whispering your name
I don't know if we can compare high school reunions anymore. The keg stands started before 7.
Walk of shaming into my apartment. No one to clap me in. Come home!
I wish our county sheriff had a comment section for their mugshots.
I still have a little drunk in my system
My ex boyfriend just amazon primed me a vibrator...guess I seemed stressed?
I s2g I’m about to get ghosted by a 34 yr old and my Oedipus complex cannot take it
I'm getting reacquainted with drunk me. She has grown up a lot.
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