You are the one person I know will appreciate this- and I'm aware that its nearly 5 am- but I have 3 words... G spot orgasm. BE JEALOUS
Id settle for living inside the pirates of the carribean ride.
woke up in a freezing tub of water at 6 am again. probably should stop the drunk baths
I just got hard thinking about a crunch wrap. Im done
Just calculated that for my last final tomorrow I need 120% to improve my grade and 53% to keep it..buying 30 packs now, go get dressed
I just dropped macaroni right down my cleavage. For the sake of our future, I'm really banking on this being a turn on for you.
Either I got the clap, or I masturbated with soap while I was sleeping.
Close. The correct answer is shitting in a public toilet. We also would have accepted the pit of despair.
thanks for the 52 voicemails of you and crystal reciting the pleg of allegance
I messaged him asking for his address. He replied with the address then said, "If you're gonna stalk me, I'm the third window on the side and usually get naked around 8am and anytime randomly after 6pm (listen for music).. If you're sending anthrax, I'm 6'2" 225lbs so send a good amount."
It'll be a romanticized airport meeting until I'm judged for sitting on his face in the terminal
I knew it was a bad night when the only thing I could remember was you force feeding me tortilla chips as I hugged the tire of my car and begged to have my stomach pumped.
You left your underwear in a sandwich bag on my kitchen counter.
Just once I'd like to go out and not have to tell you to put your pants back on.
He shit with the door open. I think that means we are in a realtionship.
Randomize
