Ill do this for you.
You are a team player.
This is me making up for not putting my tongue inside you more.
dude she licked ball and has every Are you afraid of the dark episode on dvd
lock that shit down
i have to start hiding my credit card when i drink i woke up this morning with 4 emails from Farmville telling me i spent over $800 on coins last night
I'm not gonna lie. having my legs shaved for me in the morning was a lovely surprise.
Tonight marks the 1 yr anniversary of me waking up in a bush. is that reason enough to celebrate?
I tried. Now my legs are bleeding and I cracked my head on the coffee table. Never taking your advice again.
I found her sleepin on the side of the house in the rocks. so i woke her up and yelled at her and she would only come inside if i let her sleep in the bathroom.
I just feel like I should give it a rest. I'm too old to be drinking bottles of grey goose and falling into koi ponds.
nah we got kicked outta the bar after the bouncer saw us putting straws up Chelsea's nose to make her look like a walrus after she fell asleep at the table
As I was brushing his cum out of my hair he looks at me and says "it happens to me all the time."
I WAS KIDDING ABOUT SLUTEMBER BUT ITS ACTUALLY HAPPENING
Just found an airplane bottle of whiskey and I didn't put it in my coffee. I think I deserve a little recognition this morning.
3 words: harry potter burlesque. My life is so much more awesome than yours right now.
So, were you planning on telling me you left your panties in my glovebox??
so i fell out of a tree on the ave last night. someone told me there was alcohol at the top. bastards.
Randomize
