Espresso. Can't sleep. Love puppies
Well I think that's a good thing that I'm not full of someone else.
im getting my college education on yahoo answers.
i just looked at the calendar to see when spring break is and literally stopped eating
He passed out drunk on top of me. Fully erect. Still inside me. Woke up like 1 minute later, and continued.
Housekeeping just called to see if we were okay bc they came in the room earlier and we didn't move.
Did I tell you I had a charge show up for $36 on a credit card I haven't used in 6 months from Wild Wings? It was that night we slept across the street from the bar.
she scratched her sororities letters into my back when she was done. i think i was part of some sick game. sick twisted sexy game
I'm sexting at the thanksgiving dinner table...this is a new holiday tradition.
There's no point in calling it Big Titties Tuesday if girls with big tits don't get anything special
I just spent an hour in the shower pretending I was a member of the b-52's. I can't go to work like this
I've spent my afternoon dipping strawberries in DayQuil if that's any indication of where I'm at in life.
Playing pong against a girl who fucked my ex boyfriend so that's how my nights going
Sexy intern needs to have caveman sex with me
You got drunk, made toast, and declared yourself a domestic goddess.
Randomize
