Sometimes i look at the biltmore estate and wonder just how small George Vanderbilt's penis was...
No more tipping the bathroom attendant with your phone.
Just woke up next to our cab driver from last night. Please tell me this isn't happening.
I just puked behind a tree outside work, then walked past my manager with puke in my hair. Man, I'm gonna miss this when I get a real job.
23 Theme Park Employees Confess The Biggest Adult Tantrums They’ve Witnessed
this lady just pulled corn on the cob out of her purse
People like that make this world a better place.
The reign of the rally queen is over. Welcome to the age of the walking dead.
Ran out of plates, so I'm using my sociology notes. Looks like they will finally have a practical use.
Halfway through the blowjob she stopped and said 'Wait I know this dick'.
I got the job! The hiring manager is the sister of a guy I slept with so its like I'm a real adult now
23 Crazy Psychological Tricks You Have To Try on Someone RIGHT NOW
Today's psa: there are certain parts of your body you shouldn't scratch while wearing fake nails.
you just tore your cootch a new one, didn't you?
is telling someone you can be his trophy wife the same as proposing?
Think I have the only job where I can be naked in a room with my manager at work. Apart from hookers
I don't know how to say "Sorry I was banging your boyfriend before I knew about you but you're awesome and we should hang out." without just saying it.
11:30 you texted me saying he was on his way. 11:37 you said, "Oh my God that was terrible."
I remember the Prince Albert and the three penises in the threesome. But the rest no.