the not having weed thing wouldnt be nearly as tragic if it wasnt the one holiday where they launch bright flaming things into the air
Holy jesus god. My teeth taste like street.
i wish there was an iPhone app that lets you write a TeXt LiKe tHiS
dude...come out of the closet already
you kept insisting that i was jake gyllenhaal and you were heath ledger.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I was just on craigslist and saw and ad for a naked yoga instructor. I will no longer be jobless.
juast therw a cheeeeesestirng over the fnce. stuckit to sombodys car winheild... gonna luagh if i find it mlted in the mrning.
Oh my gosh they are following me around the bar
Blow your rape whistle
Between my vibrator and my iPhone carpal tunnel is inevitable.
Today's been pretty great, I went and bought the new Batman for the sole purpose of masturbating to Bane
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
The guy at the door just stared only at my boobs and said "I'm gonna let you in." 'Merica
Love you too. There are very few people I let pee in my dishwasher.
And he came by and picked me up. We cuddled in his car then had sex until... an officer doing his rounds put a spotlight on crazy haired, naked me straddling him.
Like he was inside me when I made eye contact with a police man.
I have nothing to say other than the obvious 'we probably shouldn't have done that' and the less obvious 'i think you bruised my labia major' ...?
Just took adderall with about half a bottle of red wine...i have stopped trying for this last exam
I just trimmed my bush to manageable levels. I'm gonna take a nap and then get in there and finish the job.
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