i think im in love. he told me he doesnt care if i shave down there.
Thats the worst face I've ever seen you make an I've seen you throw up in your own hair.
i love him because he let me keep my UGGS on while we had sex
Dude. Cab ride home consisted of me making out with an Asian girl sitting next to my Dad
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
So then I proceeded to the kitchen to make my "specialty," which consisted of a frozen veggie burger topped with peanut butter. I guess he ate it too.
Am I allowed to compare getting cum'd on the face to a warm summer rain?
Well I took a spicy wing shit in a field this morning.
But he has cupcakes AND I'm guaranteed an orgasm. .. I feel like I shouldn't even have to actually make a decision here.
I'm sitting on your porch drinking wine from the bottle. Just so your new neighbors know what kind of people are in the neighborhood
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Desperate times call for desperate measures. But he promised me no small talk so that was nice
What kind of terrible faithless God would allow vodka and one ply toilet paper to coexist?
you grabbed the breathalyzer at dinner, blew a 0.20 and told the waitress you'd eat her ass
Ur here to start shit and I'm here to light that shit on fire
I want to ride that like one of the Horsemen of the Apocalypse- with bourbon in hand and without mercy.
Sexual Dilemma - Covid Edition: Flirting with a cute frat boy. The Cougar in me wants to go back to his frat house and fuck his cocky brains out. The adult in me doesn’t want to get Covid and have to quarantine in a frat house for 2 weeks\n
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