and im sitting here waiting for them to work on my car. in a room full of men. that are too old for me. its like a sausage fest nightmare...
Just heard her singing at the school concert... I am honored my penis was touched by those pipes
life is no where near the amusement park it was when I was on Vicodin.
Remind me tomorrow to take that ball-gag out of my purse.
he was like the dessert in the all you can eat man buffet that has become my life.
He told me he was in a Proactive commercial. It didn't seem to work for him but he was buying me shots so I slept with him anyways.
Oh man. Realized I was high when I realized how long I'd been watching Roseanne
Strike three, the fat brides maid they call shit puker also has herpes.
Because Kyle had a tattoo kit at his house and I wanted one and all he could draw was a mustache or a stickman on fire
I don't know how I'm going to know it's her, I only know what she looks like with a wig on
SHE COULD ALREADY BE HERE AND I WOULDN'T EVEN KNOW
Dave called me blind fucking drunk thinking he was going to die from drinking with drake bell(wtf?) saying "it's all that drake motherfucker's fault" and later proceeded to tell me "you are my twitter"
So many weird people in this class. I can practically taste their unwanted virginities. They taste bad.
Quote from doctor, "that is a VERY angry vagina".
I'm fucked.
May the power of my ass compel you!!
also i don't know what you guys ate last night but he broke the toilet
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