i am making flyers for the homeless letting them know about free chipolte day
then I woke up and felt a boner that wasn't even mine. never taking 3am vodka again
Everytime I think about NYE, my gag reflex kicks in.
If we're like this now and women reach their sexual peak in their 30's, I can't even fathom what our futures hold.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
why is there a handicap sign in the bathtub and an exit sign in the kitchen?
lets deal with that after we figure out where i am
I need to stop taking drags of other peoples cigarettes, it's such a tease. Like playing just the tip, you just can't
my mom said i couldn't bring cigarettes cause it was a family trip, which was really irresponsible of her because now i have to walk around the beach drunk trying to find someone with cigarettes.
he'll be my respectable boyfriend for tksgiving and i'll be his non-slutty girlfriend for christmas.
and then ....
he stays my gay friend and my parents think i'm not a slut.
I mean it's my life so what if i want to drink Molson from my sparkly shoes and not regret anything
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
i think i just asked a donut if it was ok
I'm crying and shaving my Bronco playoff beard
I've talked to too many cops in one week and I haven't even committed any crimes. I hate the suburbs
Costco (TM). Making alcoholism affordable!
sometimes you just have to listen to beyonce and cry. that's how life works
Oh god he’s a clown I fucked a rodeo clown
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