How long do you need to date somebody until it is acceptable to fart in their presence?
The real question is how long do you need to date them to dutch oven them?
he kept bringing up different times we had sex and i wouldnt say anything back. i would never confirm nor deny the situation...like a politician ya kno
just jacked off with my ROTC uniform on. boy i feel like an american.
im not gonna bother asking u how it was... we could hear u through the walls
come in to starbucks and ill make you a 4loko latte before theyre banned
Yeah I'm a responsible adult man but I legally unbind myself from anything that occurred that evening and am in no way responsible for those actions.
Chill out, I'm getting ready as fast as I can. I didn't even masturbate in the shower.
Someday, but I will be heavily drugged and there will be no dolphins.
Do you still speak french? one of two girls I woke up with only speaks french...
Apparently asking your girlfriends roommate for a hand job when u craw into the wrong bed after a bottle of rum is "bad form".
Every time I start to trust vodka, it does this to me.
Molly I still can't believe u puked in that guys hands and still got laid
Hey, do you know the person who woke me up last night at 1 in the morning yelling and being carried through the courtyard?
That was me Mom...
Omg dude take a shower. You'll feel like god washed away all the sinful shit we did last night.
If you wanna do actual business call my office. If you’re just looking to get laid you need to up your game
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