It's when I'm in my pajamas and in need of a gin delivery that I miss NYC most of all.
I have a page in my 2010 scrapbook dedicated to pictures of his cock.
Well I woke up with spatula marks on my ass and burns on my hands.
Don't blame me for eating all the ham.. I gave it out to people, so at most I'm guilty of ham distribution
I stole an ensure out of their fridge and started chugging it. That was when Maria made me leave.
Status Uddate: I lost half a tooth and Alison is taking Amy Grant requests via bullhorn
You picked a jagger girl up claimed her then walked out the door with her that was the last we saw of you
Would I be bad if I bought a pregnancy test at shoppers the same time I hand in a resume? Or do you think it would get me the job?
There's 50 people in our house, none of them are wearing shirts. The keg has been relocated twice and our bathroom door is missing again...when will we ever learn?
Well I took a spicy wing shit in a field this morning.
video games take priority over anything else you can offer me.
After a beer I realize now I may have shared too much about my obsession with ghosts with my therapist this morning.
you were grinding on the cop whispering for him to lend you his tazer.
So how was it?
The cemetery or the sex?
Legit just looked at the gin bottle and said, “Aw fuck, I’m going to feel this in the morning.”
Randomize
