I should have known there'd be issues when he included "beautiful soul" in our playlist
his cum tasted like old pizza and looked like old milk
other girls like to lick balls but none of them live for it like u do
she's using the space heater to try to heat up a pop-tart...
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
The cop told me to answer for everyone if there was drinking involved and then i threw up in my Luigi's italian ice that i was eating with a pizza slicer
Oh wow. Was walking and just saw her in the pool, fully clothed, ranting on an alligator float. I guess i should go get her before security gets here.
Women are fucking wierd. I have forgotten this. Divorce papers should come with a handbook.
Def just threw up beer then brushed my teeth with some randos toothpaste now back to drinkin beer
Of course I fucked him. He's a professional beat boxer, his entire job is to do complicated shit with his tongue.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Anyway, it's clearly a shapeshifting vagina/AT-AT, which I never said I was SEXUALLY attracted to. Just that I liked it.
My next goal in this relationship is to teach my boyfriend that there are valid reasons to be fear of dolphins completely.
I'm drunk listening and crying to Selena. How's your Monday?
Unfortunately i'm awake, hungover, and covered in something I'm pretty sure is Easy Cheese. Send help.
U sent me lyrics to wind beneath my wings
My liver misses your liver
Come on in. I'm butt naked, in the kitchen, eating ice pops
Randomize