If Andre Agassi did Crystal Meth, what was John McEnroe doing?
You know, last years football game was epic, but seeing the same girl that gave you a bj in the parking lot, in the same parking spot...that's fate.
I have so much boob sweat I could bathe a baby
You pretty much isn't said it
Those words don't go together.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
High water is the most godliest tasting water in the world.
I hope you enjoy this collage I made of you and me getting fucked up together
AFTER I licked the bald guys head they told me we weren't playing
Model at car show < day drinking with your favorite sister. Get your head in the fucking game Christopher.
Someone's shaving their pubes at work every Monday and it's starting to piss me off
I mean come on
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Told the cab driver to take me to narnia last night. Turns out there's a bar called narnia on the south side of town. We are in business
I just remembered I did the whole byebyebye dance at the bar
"We hooked up and in the morning he emailed me his mix tape"
I'm literally spending $165 to fly to Arizona to have a sex road trip coming back
Fuck. I did it again. I plugged in my toaster and walked away thinking it needed to preheat. I am dumb.
He’s tiny, hairless and humps my leg when he wants sex. He’s basically a chihuahua
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