The best feeling....farting and having the bubble hit your balls
i just saw a woman using her birth control packet as a wallet.
You called information & said "connect me to johnny depp" when they told u it wasn't listed u said " try depp comma johnny he's expecting my call"
I kind of feel like guidos are mythical creatures.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Dancing like a fucking crazy person to jai ho with a snow ball in her hand. Snow days make her go nuts.
There's a difference between southern and inbred. She just doesn't know that yet.
I actually want to hang out with her with our clothes on. That's a big step up for me.
Smoked a joint and chugged some pepto. Feeling a lil better... Not sure which is working..... Gonna keep doing both.....
it wasn't sex so much as.....a disastrously uncomfortable sexual experience
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Like I had to call my dad because I couldn't manage to unlock the door. And when he got there to open it I was climbing the gate to get in.
He's in a nude suit, bald, with a pink headband and a black sharpie streak down his forehead.
I haven't even sucked a boob is 6 weeks I hate not college
As much as my throat was opened up this weekend, you'd think I wouldn't nearly choke on a damn almond.
I'm too horny to sleep. I need some violent sex to wind me down.
I shit myself and fell down the stairs and I’m still finding shit In those pants.
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