normal stoners make pot brownies. gay stoners make pot chocolate covered cherries on a cinnamon graham cracker crust which by the way are very effective.
he invited me to an all week drinking party at his house. apparently he knows the key to my heart is booze shaped.
maybe after you take off her top her face will be hotter
I just stepped on my own foot and apologized to my shoe... THAT high.
I asked him if his doormat had a name, then proceeded to sit on it for the next 30 minutes while signing that magic carpet ride song from aladdin.
Cute underage boy is in my house.
OH MY GOD. DON'T DO ANYTHING. WHY IS HE IN YOUR HOUSE.
Probably not well advised, but you're welcome to stop by if your not ready to end your night. You know, for Thanksgiving's sake.
I need to stop getting drunk and telling people it isn't "about them."
I knew it was on when all she had to say about the handcuffs was 'I really hope these adjust tighter!'
Named all the presidents in order between puke sessions while semi conscious so that's a thing I can do now
I'd marry him just to keep his penis in the country
Hey before you quit, let me sell drugs to your boss at least one more time
Right in the middle of our simultaneous orgasms, he shouted "HAPPY NEW YEAR" ruining the intimacy
Had a dream we were competing for tomatos.
While he was fucking me, he just stopped and said, "Mike says Hi." Then proceeded to fuck me.
What did you do?
What do you say to that!? But, when I came, I screamed out my full name.
Randomize
