i totally forgot about the coupon that said i would show him how i pleasure myself.
This soccer player girl is eating this banana WAY to slow. Too early for penis shaped foods.
who were those guys at the table sniffing dryer sheets?
Headed to the bar now. If I smell faintly of latex and tuna, it's just the new scent I'm trying.
I just picked up my chili cheese fries off the ground ate them, and then licked up the cheese that was still on the concrete. Thank you Jagerbombs
Okay. thanks for sacraficing your body and risking aids for our snowcone business.
We just took back to back grav bong hits and are playing battleship. She guessed Z - 12 so weve switched board games.
Biggg time. I found 2 empty packages of extenze in my car this am.... not sure what that was all about
turns out putting a tie on my unicorn onesie didn't make it acceptable "formal wear" and I found salsa in my cup holder
Well I woke up at my house so that's a plus. But I'm pretty sure I peed on my sofa because I woke up in the pee position.
Also this guy in my contact as hairy jerry sent me a pic of him shirtless and said I miss you and I have no idea who he is /when or if I met him but that's not normal?!
Come to this bar
But I'm full of food.
MAKE ME FULL OF YOUR DICK
My ex's new girlfriends ex boyfriend is getting me my nipples pierced for Valentine's Day so who's the real winner here
Woke up to find that I was cock blocked by no more than three people.
I think I'm taking after my dog, I just want to hump everything
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