Sitting at a red light. Windows are down. I'm blasting Gaga's "Disco Stick" and doing an interpretive dance to it because I think I'm hilarious. Look to the left and see two Phi Delts that I know with their windows down. They are horrified. I am probably going to lose their Facebook friendships.
college drinking is stealing all my money, thank god planned parenthood is somewhat free
Mid thrust he tells me that we have bio together
Real housewives of new joisy starts MONDAY. Skype session after? Virtual slap the bag?
i keep looking at my boobs and it just baffles me how he could give this up.
you're going to have to hot glue me into my dress tonight. there's no way out.
Happy heartbreak day....you got chocolates, I'm eating them/ throwing them out the window at passing couples
When you are old and getting humped by saggy balls every other weekend you are gonna wish you had more sex with freshly legal boys. Your vagina will thank you one day. Don't let her down.
Also there's a home game tomorrow and I thought about holding up a sign that says, "I madeout with #64 during orientation week" would that be inappropriate??
I settled on "Merry Christmas! Btw you may have chlamydia". I thought a nice holiday greeting would soften the blow
Btw. I have a sinus infection from doing cocaine in a portapotty at a Duran Duran concert. So, gimme a couple of days before y'all start the party.
A relationship is waiting for him to fall asleep so you can cum (finally!) while watching porn
Oh BTW the next time I see you I don't care where we are your dick will be going into some part of my body.
I'm hungover and in a fort. And I hate you.
So many questions
its not much but to go through all that to ask for half a balls worth of money was so stressful
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