I need a slap back to reality. Or at least a slap back to homosexuality
Now you know why i just sit on the toilet and scream
worst night to have a conscience
I really couldn't tell if she was disgusted with the fact that I yacked on her shoes, or if she was about to do the same to me.
The girl I hooked up with in exchange for Ramen freshmen year is living with the girl I currently wish to bang.
Try oodles of noodles this time.
By "met a doctor" I really mean "fucked a pre med student"
I hope you dream of an avalanche of penises
im in the library and there's this guy on a computer just staring at a google image of beer. finals week is rough.
Omg have I shown you my skeezy ex fiancée?
The other one.
I hate being the only medical professional in the group. I always end up patching you guys or being the DD when I'm on call. I have problems I need to drown in booze too...
Worse. He's Mormon. At least a gay guy will go get drinks with me.
I lost my pants last night, she told me I walked into their room after leaving 5 minutes before wearing my thong.....and no pants. I have absolutely no idea where I left them.
i was sitting on the kitchen floor shaking my gallon of vodka at people and asking if they wanted to climb the heaven hill... getting dumped is the best thing that has ever happend to me
He kept apologizing that the nerve damage makes him take a while to finish. Meanwhile he gave me 3 orgasms and a leg cramp
Only you could benefit from a reckless driver
I resent the implication of a jizz addiction
Randomize
