I just woke up in the back of his van. Bring me a sunkist.
It's true- you can buy beer at McDonald's in France. I'm not coming back to the States.
yeah you're probably right.. i should stop equating love with getting naked on a webcam for him.
they call him the transporter because he'll be your designated driver in exchange for sufficient weed or sex.\n
what about money
no - he has a code he lives by
I have a theory he's part Neanderthal
He just remixed a spongebob song with 2 chainz..... Clearly I love him
Fried chicken is a must. Do strippers eat fried chicken or should I plan on something else?
At the same time that I bought plan b I got some Girl Scout cookies too. It's not a total loss for you.
My roomate has me out looking for easter kegs hidden arround town
Was I at least a good cuddler? Like at least honorable mention?
haha all our friends are at the carnival and I'm on stage dry humping a 40 year old
ORGASMS AND PIZZA
PIZZA AND ORGASMS
She said she was sober from drugs for a week. All I heard was Kenny Loggins singing Danger Zone.
He told me that when he bends me over that chair I remind him of a bull rider. So thanks for being the ex that helps my present sex life
I asked him to get me another beer, and he started making muffins.
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