saw my dad's penis on the x-ray last night. at least his hip wasn't broken
That guy youre talking to looks like Brian from Family Guy.
i wanted to be an indian when i was a child. apparently you cannot grow up to be an indian.
I woke up because I was nodding to the dream question of "would you like a sombrero?"
come onnn, where's your sense of adventure?!
I left it in that guy's dorm room.
She liked to slap me in the face while she was on top. All I can say is that big boobs can excuse a lot.
We can't tell anyone we fucked because I'm still trying to get with your friend. Is she coming next weekend?
if this uncomfortable exchange we're having is you trying to flirt with me i suggest you stop it before someone gets hurt
Ya. My thumbs are those buffalo's, but my legs are spirits and my torso is that Indian guys and my head is the eagle
is leaving the club to fk in his friends van subtle?
I think my teeth are moving, they feel like people.
Tempted to tell the Titos promoters at this bar that they are doing the lords work.
sometimes you just gotta rip off the nipple tape and get it done.
people need to understand when I say I don't want to drink anymore that doesn't mean tempt me with another bottle of Jose Cuervo.
It's almost 5am and all I can keep thinking is IT'S WHISKEY TIME!!
Randomize
