boyfriend # 1 is in the bathroom and boyfriend # 2 is ringing the doorbell need back up this is not a drill i repeat this is not a drill
did you know that if you have sex in the elevator on the way up that people can still get in?
My worst case scenario tonight is that I fuck a hot Swiss girl. Let that give you perspective on my life at the moment.
But the real question is how many people didn't see my dick last night?
Having a midget officiate your wedding because you think it'd be hilarious: good idea or potential lawsuit?
There are reggae songs being written about me...where have I gone wrong in life?
It's blow job season.
Finally another gay clarinet player. They're surprisingly rare.
You know you come from good stock when you can have a family discussion about excuses to scam pain pills from the doctors
I don't think I will ever be as happy about anything as this man next to me on the bus eating Taco Bell.
Chilling on my porch debating between pre work drinking or video games and getting high.
Well ill be drunk so just come find me. Its like where in the world is Joey San Diego
The annual Father's Day Wake and Bake has been canceled due to lack of hustle.
Exactly best part of my night he took of his shirt and surprise traveler fanny pack
Will you PLEASE get your mom to stop telling me I'd make a great husband? She knows I'm gay, right?!
I know, but she really likes you. Have you met my brother yet?
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