Courtney? Is that you? I have pictures of this very same night.
How was last night?
She looked like Delta Burke in her fat Designing Women days ... and she just left like 2 minutes ago. Right after breakfast.
i slept with her, drove her to her sisters house to babysit, and then drove around the block where i met her sister and had sex with her in my van. I'm family Friendly!
All I want in this world right now are Doritoessssss
OK. You going to get home safe? Who are you with?
Doritoesssssss
I love you. Thanks for all the blowjobs.
My google searches from last night: tetanus shot rabbit bite, Bacardi gluten free
turns out that the cat the james was trying to catch was a raccoon. call me when you get this, i need an ER buddy
They were picking gravel out of my face for an hour. I think I took more out of the road than the road did of me.
Barfights against pavement aren't genrally won by people. Props.
Hahah. They reconnected again?
Like with his penis I guess
You're an idiot. I have LIVED as a cautionary tale of what happens when you drink too much and stick your dick in crazy, HAVE YOU LEARNED NOTHING?
I just had sex with the megalodon show on in the background and it was just as magical as it sounds
This morning confirmed it...there's no maybe about it. She definitely wasn't born with it. It was definitely the Maybelline.
There is nothing worse then the feeling after you've held in farts all night..
What's his name?
After finding out he was married when we were together, I don't trust him.
I just upped my southern womanhood. Taking whiskey and Kleenex pocket packs to the funeral.
Randomize
