he's the Salvador Dali of pubic shaving
dude im shwasted, kabul is not the best place for this
I'm buying eyelash glue, salt, and limes. We know how tonight is ending.
do you think semen can infect my impacted wisdom tooth
First off, get on bc solely in preperation for this event. Second, as my little sister you have a lot of whore to live up to.
Birthday Treasure Hunt was to follow the clues. At each spot there was a stick on tattoo and a shot and at the end there was 2 cases of beer. I have 13 tattoos and don't remember turning 18.
There is a large scratch and bruise about the size of a pizza bagel next to my vagina. Please text back if you know what happened.
No one ever gets any after sleeping with her. She is like the broken mirror of hookups, enjoy 7 years of blue ball. Don't say I didn't warn you
ALMOST WRECKED MY SCOOTER. DAVE FRANCO HAS A TWIN AMD HE GOES HERE
Somehow I ended up in a different costume dancing with some tree of a guy in the basement bathroom, what did you give me?
Watching the Walking Dead, snuggled up naked, and drinking a beer. No better way.
If ever there was a tweet to describe your life, it's this.
He said that he made a girl squirt to the ceiling and I got curious
I thought if I bought the most expensive pregnancy test I would look like I had my life together
...okay, you can't just say 'masturbating llama' and not explain yourself
I'm about to do something based solely on the fact that a fortune cookie told me to. This may not end well.
Randomize
