Also I am about to cut a ringtone from "Sex Machine" so James Brown can tell me to "get up, get on up" in the morning
I once woke up to the scream from 'get up offa that thing' and smacked my head on my desk
it only took me 1 hour to write 8 pages. i'm never doing school work without adderall ever again.
she just took adderol and chased it w dog water
I told him i wanted to be exclusively cheating with him
I'm still seeing blue. who wrote on my bare nipple?
Chelsea passed out in the kiddie pool. Just added around 28 boxes of jello powder. Will let you know how it works out
Dude she's on meds. He has a ginormous penis. Ur A dumbass. That concludes our feelings chat. Dim Sumday?
YES. YOU ARE GOING TO HAVE SEX WITH ME WHILE I SING LES MIS.
Please tell me you aren't concussed from dancing on the stripper pole
Just stepped off the plane in St. Louis. I'm breaking out in hives, I'm allergic to Midwesterners. Can't WAIT to get the fuck out of here.
She's relieving herself in the laundry room. I'm really hoping there's a toilet in there...
I think I offered a man a blowjob for his power ranger suite last night...
i'm at work, alone, drinking a spiced chai & fireball hot toddy. holiday OT isn't that bad after all.
I may or may not have just had sex in the bed of a pick-up at a drive-in movie theater.
I don't know why this person would ask for help. It sounds pretty OK to me. Also, I'd steal those bagpipes.
Randomize
