tonight, alcohol would be proud of us
Do the low cut shirt test. If he stares at your tits even in front of your brother, he's down.
do to the flooding of the park, there will be a midnight bikini mud wrestling party behind my dorm. all are welcome.
After much deliberation I've decided to name my penis "Arthur", hope your mom's surgery goes well.
my car smells like vomit and bananas. this can't really be my life.
do you find it slutty that the last person I had sex with is also the person who sings my ringtone ?
also bought condoms to give away to people who look like they're about to make a bad halloween decision. I'm like a fairy.
The only funny part about this situation was this morning when they rounded up all the drunks in the ER, piled us into a minivan, then dropped us all off at our houses.
would it be mean if I put better with the lights off on my sex playlist just for my hook up with him?
Tell me about it. Running across highways take alot outta ya. When he found out, he was all "concerned" about it.
You told us that you don't have to wait in line at Taco Bell. Then, drove up to the window and grabbed someone else's food.
He put a canoe in the lazy river at the water and started paddling away from security
well a fat roach just fell out of my hair. so there's that
I just showed this kid my nipples to work my shift tmw
I couldn't find a water bottle, so I sent her to school with her juice in a flask. Who the hell let me become a parent?
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