i'm only drinking out of pineapples from now on.
Hashbrowns don't come out your nose as easily as you would think
I knew her barely 30 minutes before we got naked. This whole fraternity thing is starting to grow on me...
just credit carded her and her mom at the same time... that drunk. get on my level
No big deal, we were just two friends having sex. It's perfectly normal we don't remember. Water under the sex bridge,
If it was designed to hold water, it was designer to hold wine
I was going to text him and apologize but I didn't want him to think that meant I approved of him being my niece's booty call.
i wish it would rain vodka just once. i have not puked yet bring it on
to improve your porn experience, just imagine a slow speaking older English man narrating it all like a Nature documentary
OMG THE KID WHO TRIED TO MAKE OUT AT THE BAR WITH ME IS SITTIG NEXT TO ME IN THE AIRPORT. WHY LIFE WHY???
first thing my tuition money buys is a strap on
while i am personally glad that we met...i feel like for society as a whole it was a bad thing
never planned on seeing last weekend's one night stand again, much less be on the same plane as him..
I would fuck him just for his dog
Live it up bro, they're always so surprised to find out you use magnums, being such a tiny man and all. It's a good thing.
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