Now it won't go down.
You've got a gift.
so then we both started to do the walk of shame and she didnt realize we had fucked in her apartment until some lady said hi to her in the elevator
you didnt stop her?
too entertaining
Karaoke makes my soul die one wretched song at a time
how lazy do you have to be to be a fat vegetarian?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
so i decided to listen to you and went ahead and slept with him. you owe me 3 minutes
Wednesday. Otherwise known, to you at least, as "there are two gay men in my bed" day.
What can I say, we hook up during the holidays.. We're a seasonal couple
He had a ladies night special at his place. Unlimited jello shots till 10, 50 cents after.
Everyone was passed out so I turned off the lights and locked all the doors. I also took the chicken sandwich in the microwave as payment.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
He's doing his thing where I don't know if he's alive until three in the afternoon so idk
I mostly blame me being such a miserable fuck on the fact that I was born on a Monday.
I mean you can one up her. Instead of ruining friendships you can ruin marriages.
That was just an endearing nickname I called you before. I'm not gonna call you a filthy slut now that you are one, I don't want to hurt your feelings.
It was like if the scent of sour milk and burning tires had a baby in taste form.
Who brings a stripper to breakfast at the dining hall? What was the plan? Impress her with his meal plan?
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