on a scale of one to ten, how awkward would it i told him i had to go change my tampon and then left?
11
My mom found a condom in my purse
Correction: my mom found a used condom in my purse.
THAT'LL be a good time.
and i don't know why my phone always capitalizes that word.
i wish semen tasted like chocolate
90 In a 65. Talked my way out of it with the i have to poop story. i am the ticket jesus
Just sold a bike on craig's list for 4 four lokos and a 40. How bad do you miss college?
i walked in and you were spoon feeding your sister grape juice out of a tupperware.
You have proved your worthiness to join me on the quest of taking shots at every academic building on campus by showing up drunk to our test at 12:30 today
He's sitting in his room on Facebook with nothing but a pillow covering his crotch. I can't help you at the moment.
i convinced him to be a french maid for halloween. he has no idea what he's in for. i just ordered the breast forms.
We had sex on the playground and then walked around his neighborhood grading houses based on their Christmas decorations
Because bro, I don't want your dick being touched mid conversation.
He started yelling terms of endearment at a cheese sandwich. Then he tried to hump it.
I can count on one hand the number of good things that happened over the past year.
Let me call you later. I’m lining up some office dick now that working at home is ending
Randomize
