4 words: hood of his car
I knew the sex would be bad when he slipped the rubber on and said "safe sex activated"
How do i write this on his wall without making it sound like he gave me an std?
all she kept saying was "harder" "mayo" and "who are you"
I'm just gonna go nail your roommate after we break up anyway.
votings over. no more wacking it to anti christine o'donnell ads
I added "don't hook up with boys with girlfriends" to my new years resolution and realized how sad it was that it made me actually feel like a better person
He is the one I "technically" lost my virginity to.
I feel like you never had a virginity..
Maybe shotgunning 4 days after oral surgery wasn't such a good idea after all...
The last thing I remember before blacking out was telling Jamie that she was too fat even for my standards. The first thing I remember after blacking out was waking up next to her.
it took us a while to figure out sex on a tire swing, buuuuuuuut MISSION ACCOMPLISHED
VAL. THIS MOTHERFUCKER IS LAYING IN MY BED WEARING A CAT SHIRT, VAL. COME SAVE ME, VAL.
I'm on A4A looking at dick pics while the CEO is on the phone trying to convince me not to leave the company
It can't be Friday yet, in still getting friend requests of people I don't remember from last weekend
The playlist was "songs to sing in the shower". I literally got fucked to Footloose.
Randomize
