Dude someone changed all the contacts in my phone to I Like Eggs
im gay
i know
yea but for you.
I'm not sure if doing him was such a good idea. Yes the sex was good, but I'm scared I set myself up for failure in 2011 because he's the hottest guy. Ever.
and I keep making him eat me out and buying me presents, this is paradise. I wish he cheated on me earlier.
I woke up on your bathroom floor, i used your towel I found laying on the floor as a cape to get to your bed. I thought it would help me walk straight if I looked like a superhero
My face feels like its stuck between a ball sack and an asshole.
I'm just learned what a rim job is, I feel like crying
i think you may have a shot to cock block in a moment. just saying.
Wake up an cock block please bc these are noises i dont ever want to hear again
its not like i called off work either time for the purpose of tripping, it was more like well, i have nothing to do now today, there is acid and im only human.. but twice
I do NOT want to date a man who has no interest in going to a kangaroo farm
I'm just more comfortable with the bondage
Its official. The summoning powers of my vagina are unmatched by anything in this world
"suitors" is just a nice way of her saying "the guys i'm fucking"
Well the grass always *looks* greener on the other side but sometimes that’s bc there’s a sewage runoff...
Can’t. Tonight’s a netflix and dick night
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