I think im going to throw up on grandma
If no ones going to say it, then I will. Vanessa Hudgens boobs are weird looking
tonight i'm making a christmas tree shaped shot pyramid
We told the pizza man that the door was most likely unlocked, he could leave the pizza on the counter and give himself 20%. He did it-I'm never moving out of Aspen.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I just threw up during my phone interview for the largest PR firm in the world.
ya i guess you have to take things with a grain of salt in a place where nipple clamps are the norm..
She said, "awww, you're so sweet" after I started putting on a condom. How many STDs have I just contracted?
...I can smell the alcohol on your breath through that text
Dad danced with a girl half his age and her boyfriend just sat at the bar and waited for dad to be done. I bought pity nachos.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I witness him finger a girl behind the dj decks yet I'm still going to meet up with him. Wtf is my life
he went down on me while I ate Oreos. I don't know what caused the orgasm.
Honestly it was like 3 AM and I only agreed to go to the strip club because I wanted chicken tenders
She came out of the bathroom listening to her iPod and crying. Then she started scream 'she will be loved'. She seems to be handling the break up well lol
I'm trying to secure Christmas dick. Idgaf if he has strep or not.
I think we have some hyper-understanding of each other when drunk, because looking back at our text convo from last night, they were literally just jumbled letters.
Randomize