If you liked it then you shoulda put your dick in it, oh uh uh oh
everyone who works at gamestop is basically destined to live with their parents for the rest of their lives... so i said no.
yeah so our basement was flooded 4 feet. we just smoke and drank and then went swimming. gotta make the best out of it
Pretty sure I went to the bar in my bathing suit, sweat pants, and high heels.
Last night she showed me how to clean my bowl and now she's drunk making peanut butter filled cookies. Best. Roommate. Ever.
I don't know how I'm boarding the plane tomorrow. I have my car registration.
He went down on me while I had rollers in my hair. I've never felt more like a lady.
Hello Officers/Paramedics, judging by last night, my friend is dead. The money in his pockets is mine, he owed me. Please send me directions to whichever morgue/strip club for pick up.
that's all we do, eat and hve sex, eat and have sex. he thinks it's bad and that we need to talk more or whatever but I'm just not seeing the problem...
We were high as shit. We argued for like ten minutes about going to Dunkin Donuts and then just ended up rolling down hills. Thanks for the weed.
SOMEONE WITH THE TWITTER HANDLE "METHLAB" FAVORITED THAT PICTURE
we told you you couldn't get your dick sucked because you were a girl and you yelled at us and said we were 'discriminating you'
So the tow truck driver didn't charge us because Ian convinced him that he was sent out by God to share his cocaine with us.
just realized we fucked to the ultimate disney playlist last night. hakuna matata.
I’m mid 4sum and you’re sending me photos of your cat. We had very different evenings.
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