Also, the republican called me again last night. He called me dumb and ugly then begged to come over. Gosh... he knows how to make me want him...
So she is eating her margarita with tortilla chips....like using her chip as a spoon
They let you pick the name that they announce for you at graduation. The professional world needs to prepare itself for papa smurf mcdonald.
just found glitter in my belly button...seriously when will this nightmare end
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Cognac is not meant to be taken in shots. I just wanted you to know the desperation of last night.
Yeah I made some freshmen feed me oddles of noodles and I passed out
I'm tired of stuffing my fat into a slutty costume. Next year let's go as homeless girls. Cute ones. In leggings with camel toe.
My mom just looked at me while watching the fireworks and asked if it reminded me of how I felt after sex. I'm so uncomfortable.
I hate it when fuck holes buy me drinks at the bar. You don't know my order. You don't know me. You don't know where I've been. You don't know my life.
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Wait, whatever happened to locking our vaginas in closets?
I don't know. I was hiding and the bed was banging. I am going to sleep now in someone's car.
My night can be summed up in 3 words: Vodka. Threesomes. Hospital.
I'M MAKING HIKING PLANS WITH THE GIRL WHO IS DATING MY EX, THAT IS PERSONAL FUCKING GROWTH
WHAT IS WRONG WITH YOU
MANY MANY THINGS AND MOST OF THEM ARE YOUR FUCKING FAULT
What the fuck i just wanna eat my froot loops and sext in peace. Y'all motherfuckers gotta be loud as shit and break my concentration
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