You would DIE at the bar we're at right now. All indian/asian med students, I swear
Asian doctor ratio. So hot. I would've gone into heat
the sham wow guy got arrested for beating up a hooker.
I am puke
Is it 'vaginas' or 'vaginae?'. Either way there were a shit ton of them.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
The woman at walgreens tried to sell me clearance condoms with my fake eyelashes. Does it look like I get laid?
That adds atleast one bjs worth of awkward sexual tension between us.
Just because it's been in my vagina doesn't mean it's important to me
Me and my vagina aren't speaking at the moment.
Shitshow foam night was such a success
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Well would you like to come over anyway? I will be wearing sweatpants and disappointment. Also, I have Jack Daniels and I've managed to get drunk in under half an hour. But my boobs look awesome.
He started screaming when he saw my dog. He thought it was a polar bear
I bought new panties to console myself ... you know, because I am going to lose my ovaries. Well, if I don't die of a heart attack first. But at least when the EMS folks find me, I'll be finely dressed from the waist down.
It's one am and you're asking me if you should buy a plane ticket for a booty call.
I am convinced you could sleep through the apocalypse and only wake up because youre hungry & want Dominoes
easy for you to say. you're not the one who has to explain why you woke up with a pineapple and a used condom.
Randomize