Would you object to my putting the bidet video on my Facebook page? It;s awesome.
So I went on a date with this girl...and whos our waitress? My girlfriend got a second job she didn't tell me about to afford my bday present.
He jizzed my face. I had to ask for a washcloth. He ran his underwear under the water and handed them to me. Not so romantic.
hey can i play with your boom stick tonite? I'll let you shoot the love of jesus in my face.
come over
the biggest problem in our relationship is that im team edward and my boyfriend is team jacob
He just did blow off my nipples. He's not serious about his girlfriend.
and when he finished he handed me a baby wipe so i could clean up. i'm ok with the fact that he has kids, but not sure how to react to this.
it's like heaven, but drunker
why does my status of facebook already read REHAB 2011
Referring to yourself in third person during sex is apparently an instant turn off
If your boss lets you sleep on his couch, you don't pay him back by boning his daughter.
Hooked up with a girl in the dorm laundry room tonight. And got invited to go to Vegas for free. That's how today's going.
The dick pic bandit just sent me a poem about showering..
Drove by a guy getting road head, midday on O Street. That could be us, but you won't let me in your pants when you drive.
I've done dumber things than this for flimsier reasons. Come with. If I pull it off I need a witness, and if I fail I need an escape plan.
Randomize
