Cool, see you soon... she just admitted to her friends that it was a queef.
Well i threw up in my mouth a few times. But i successfully swallowed it. Still going strong.
The party theme was heirs and heiress's. Most guys came in polo shirts but he came as the "arch duke of vagina".
her moans were so awkward that i kept asking "what" when she'd say my name...
That poor kid, I literally invited myself over and took advantage of him.
yea I'm sure he was really upset some drunk girl showed up to fuck him.
Do you have to put it that way?
Thank you for holding my bra last night while i did a topless lap around the house
Sooo the theme of my 21st is rapidly becoming Gay Mexico
I just made the pizza guy say helicopter six times in order to get his money. Even he knows how stoned we are.
I'm going to fake an anxiety attack to get to the front of the line. Save me some brisket.
Yeah, first date. First take a pic of him to circulate around for your friends and than have him fill out a short penis questionnaire. Seems completely legit to me.
I don't know what his name was or what he looked like, but I remember him rocking me to sleep with his cock
I was stuffing my vagina with gummy bears last night having him eat them out of me. Team Haribo for the win!
Dude, I can't even reach my asshole to wipe it. I have a lot more to be thankful for this Thanksgiving.
I can't help you there
Someone just asked me if I was chewing red hot gum.... I'm LITERALLY SWEATING OUT FIREBALL.
I just puked into a clean basket of laundry.
Randomize
