ok, i just want to know who did it and which end it came out of
47 days without vaginal penetration. Im pretty sure it's grown over.
Do you realize that if your cunt was a missing person it would be assumed dead?
Just found out its our ciliated mucous membrane that traps the molly when we snort it. Biology does relate to life
Wait time out. Did I start last night with pants?
Can u please come get me. My car keys are gone. Somehow I ended up sleeping in my trunk
Currently getting "blaow" buzzed into my pubes. How's your thursday?
Found a girl that was gonna make out with 25 people for her 25th birthday. I was like #12. Made top half!
We weren't even through customs yet, and we got offered weed. You would love Jamaica.
I am disappointed by everyone's lack of ability to dance on a stripper pole:(
You just gave me the title for the series of our lives. Haha. Chapter 12: the cocaine on the back of the hairbrush
Just walked by the barren window naked in a family neighborhood. Who needs dignity.
Pooping with Eye of the Tiger playing. Not a single fuck shall be given.
Noo not in a booty call way, in a 'How are your abs and penis doing today?' sort of way.
Fuck it, i havent messed around in half a year. I have sexual tension with a fire hydrant.
Ughh I think I'll just sit here in the dark and wallow in self-pity while drinking wine and knitting scarves for my future cats.
Randomize
