My husband just tried to seduce me by saying we can do it doggystyle so you can watch tv
so she asking me "is it okay to have dangling labias?"
So what does a sober person do in Vegas on a Friday night?
I just withdrew $200 in ones. I think the teller knew what was up
Are you still at the party or did I leave?
Does this sound normal?...She's ironing on pictures of her dead cat to all of her green clothes...
um, yes. it's my birthday, of course there will be acid.
These pissing matches have to stop. They led to last night's scotch through the nose shots. I'll never smell again.
How are you going to come here and fuck on our couch ? That's everyones couch
if elf comes on TV one more time i swear to god i will smash my brains out with this fruitcake
I really don't want to get drunk alone tonight. Like, I'll do it, but I won't enjoy it.
I just did the math technically I'll be drunk until 2:30-3:00pm
he just asked me that if he was a penguin and I was a penguin if I would fuck him
The last thing I remember is trying to chug the rest of the everclear, running through a fence, and laying down in the snow. I hurt.
Only if I get to be Gritty
How would you be Gritty for a fantasy hockey league?
Don't worry about it.
Randomize
